By Dr Waka
E don finally shele o my people, that wicked gateman for the notorious gate of hell at Embassy of Nigeria for Rome, that illiterate wey him name resemble Rumoh, che nome, ragazzi miei, from one village near Calabar, don get demotion to night watchman. Waka hear for Termini say some oga at the top don’t like the manner wey this Rumoh fella dey treat Nigerians at his duty post inside gate of hell. Them say this Rumoh like roja nor be small, in fact one notorious tout with over 20 years experience for Via Orazio, talk say Rumoh middle name na roja. Hin like bribe die. Them say hin fit collect roja from anyone plus including ekwensu his master.

Na so one woman from north wey recently repent as madam come put head for Embassy to come renew her Naija passport, she still carry her 8 year old son follow body. Na so the junior gateman way day operate outside the gate come pass the woman and her child but immediately she enter the gate of hell for inside embassy come see roadblock. Na so Rumoh begin dey cut eye and all sorts sign language to talk to the woman to play ball if she must pass the final frontier before reaching passport office. Trust ex-madame na, she self begin roll her eyes for this mean man wey like dog meat as hin like roja. Abasi! Nor be small thing o.

Nor do nor do Rumoh wey get experience for roja matter know where the woman dey go, him nor get time to waste, he turned to one tout wey they help am coordinate matter to send in his own client. Na so gbege take shele o, the woman vowed that it is over her dead body that someone else will pass the gate of hell before her. She begin quote law for Rumoh, saying he’s not even ashamed as public gateman not to be wearing mask when the law say make everybody dey wear mask. Na so the woman quickly put her son behind her so as to protect him from some ignoramus. Ewo, this one don pass me o. Na so this woman come threatened Rumoh that she must complain to his ogas that he was demanding roja, cutting eye for her and risking the life of her son and hers to Coronavirus. This one fear me o. Idem anyeng!

As news of Rumoh demotion hit town na so him enemies begin rejoice. Waka hear from the mouth of some Eiye boys for inside one local train for Orte that even some of Rumoh fellow gatemen are rejoicing at the news of his demotion to night watchman which they describe as dry shift. I still hear for Casilina say Rumoh is now blaming that woman for using her witchcraft to cause his demotion to night watchman. A begi pack well jare, before nko, when you dey do wicked things you nor know say your cup go soon full. Ewu one euro, go enjoy your dry new shift before retirement letter lands. Anuofia!